Commander Pellimus Garside
blightwalker: rottenweiler: i know that the bicycle thing is probably being used as a euphemism for “he sleeps with a lot of people” but all i could imagine at first was going on a date with a really attractive, intelligent man, and you get super attached to him but then one day when you finally go back to his house after dinner you unzip his pants or unbutton his shirt and suddenly all of his clothes fall off and he’s a bike. literally a bike. he clatters to the ground with a cling and a clang and you stand there in the living room, staring at a bike on the ground, and you think, why does this always happen to me dying. that was my first thought too LOL

blightwalker:

rottenweiler:

i know that the bicycle thing is probably being used as a euphemism for “he sleeps with a lot of people” but all i could imagine at first was going on a date with a really attractive, intelligent man, and you get super attached to him but then one day when you finally go back to his house after dinner you unzip his pants or unbutton his shirt and suddenly all of his clothes fall off and he’s a bike. literally a bike. he clatters to the ground with a cling and a clang and you stand there in the living room, staring at a bike on the ground, and you think, why does this always happen to me

dying.

that was my first thought too LOL

Reblogged 2 months ago from blightwalker (Originally from andaliteticklefight)
4,223 notes
Source: andaliteticklefight
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    ROFLMAOAFDGBDSZVC
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  14. scratcher-cat reblogged this from h0stel and added:
    Reboobing just for the bicycle thing. XD
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  18. shuvva reblogged this from thelogicalsong and added:
    Always reblog for that commentary.
  19. louisecleverly reblogged this from shimmersauce and added:
    WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME
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    Does that make me illuminati?
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